broccoli stuffed flounder

modified from the Better Homes & Gardens cookbook, 1999

4 to 6 4-oz fresh or frozen skinless flounder, sole, or other mild fish fillets, about 1/4” thick

1-1/2 C frozen broccoli, thawed & finely chopped

1 beaten egg

12 oz onion & chives flavored soft cream cheese OR

12 oz brick style cream cheese, whipped with dried minced onion & chives added

1/3 C grated parmesan cheese

1 C herb stuffing mix

¼ C milk

¼ C dry white wine

1. Thaw fish; rinse & pat dry with paper towels.

2. Drain broccoli, squeezing out excess liquid. Combine egg, half the cream cheese, and parmesan. Stir in the broccoli & stuffing mix. Spoon stuffing onto wide end of each fillet and roll up, securing with toothpicks as necessary.

3. Place toothpick-side up in a greased glass baking dish. Bake at 350* for 30 to 35 minutes or till fish flakes easily with a fork and stuffing is hot.

4. Meanwhile, cook remaining cream cheese, milk and wine in a small saucepan on med-low heat until heated through, stirring often. DO NOT BOIL. Serve sauce over fish.

Extra sauce is tasty on steamed broccoli. Make more if you want to save some for another meal in the week.

WD-40 and needle nose pliers

in case you haven't heard before, i am pretty independent. my mother was always the hand-wringing waif on the side of the road, waiting for a nice strong man to come change her tire. except that she didn't talk to strangers. so it was usually a long wait until my dad could get off work and come rescue his fair maiden. my father wanted me to be different, and i quote, "no daughter of mine will stand helplessly on the side of the road." before i was allowed to take my driver's test, i had to demonstrate my knowledge of the inner workings of my own car. i had to change a tire and the oil & filter. and that included getting the motha f#%*^% jack back into it's place. i had to know how to check for a bad spark plug and maintain the fluid levels in my car. the only time i called for help was for two busted tie-rods in the middle of a busy intersection in the heat of friday night rush hour. tow truck time.

the "knowledge is power" that my father instilled in me carries on to this day. i've trouble-shooted (is that the proper past tense?) my washing machine, bikes and a ceiling fan, ordered parts online and repaired them myself. and when i get stuck, i have friends to help me figure things out. they are the good ol' google-meister, and my favorite book:

Dare to Repair, A Do-It-Herself Guide to Fixing (Almost) Anything in the Home, by Julie Sussman & Stephanie Glakas-Tenet.

i bought the book the day after we signed a contract with a realtor to start looking for our very own house. with no on-call repair folks included in the monthly mortgage payment, i thought it best to figure out how houses work so to better decide when to call a repair person. i read the book cover-to cover in a couple of days. not necessarily an interesting read, but it was well worth stocking up on the info. i called the rental office and asked for a work order on my bathroom sink to "replace the broken clevis strap on the pop-up stopper." when dude got there, looked under the sink and confirmed my diagnosis, he was 1) shocked that i had known the names of the parts and 2) wanted to know how i'd figured out that was the problem, and not a clogged drain. i beamed.

i've used the book quite a lot in the past 3.5 years, and it isn't just repairs. it also has lots of tips on what maintenance needs to be done when, including cleaning dryer vents, refrigerator maintenance and gutters. the last time i picked it up? just this morning. i've never heard of anyone breaking their key off in a lock before. i remember glancing over that and thinking, "if you're breaking keys in locks, there is a lot more wrong with you than just needing a locksmith." well, *ahem* i tripped coming in the front door this morning and bent my key in half, mostly because apparently i decided that the little key would hold me up. in trying to ease it back out again, it snapped. i swallowed the panic rising in my throat, calmly walked three feet to the bookcase, and pulled out my little book of friends.

page 154 had all the info i needed. if you can see the key sticking out, gently spray the keyhole (around the key, not pushing it further in) with WD-40 (or cooking spray, in a real pinch) and use the needle-nose pliers to gently free the key. and don't fall on the keys again. and if i couldn't see the key? i would have called a locksmith for an estimate, and determined which would cost less: extracting the key professionally or running to home depot and replacing the deadbolt altogether. i've done that before. it's cake.

i've just learned today that the same ladies who wrote my favorite chick-book also have branched out into specialties: plumbing and car repair. since we most often call experts to our house for heating and plumbing issues, i'll be requesting that book really soon. and both of our warranties just expired on our 6+ and 7+ year old cars. barnes & noble, here i come!

mocha shortbread rounds

Sophisticated enough for a grown-up tea party, sweet enough to serve for an afternoon snack. Fantastic dunkers, whether in milk, coffee, tea, or cocoa. They also make great gifts, stacked in a plastic bag and tied with festive ribbon.

1-1/2 C unbleached flour
1/2 C cocoa powder
1/4 tsp salt
1 Tbs instant espresso OR
2Tbs instant coffee
1 C (2 sticks) softened unsalted butter
1C firmly packed brown sugar
1/4 C toasted finely chopped hazelnuts (optional)

1. Sift together dry ingredients. Cream butter and sugar on medium speed until fluffy, 2-3 minutes. Add the dry ingredients and mix just until dough forms...do NOT overmix.

2. Separate dough into two sections. Turn onto wax paper and roll into a 2-inch log shape. Use empty paper towel roll for a guide, if necessary. Repeat with the second section of dough. Roll in toasted chopped hazelnuts to add crunch, if desired. Wrap the dough in wax paper and plastic, place in fridge for 1-2 hours, no more than 24. (Logs can be frozen and will keep for one month.)

3. Preheat oven to 250*. Slice the dough into 1/3-inch thick rounds and place them on parchment paper lined cookie sheet. Bake cookies until they are dry and firm, about 45 minutes; do NOT overbake. Let stand on cookie sheet for 5 minutes before transferring to a wire rack.

pride

 the following is my 8th grader's final language arts persuasive presentation. i am so proud to have raised such an open-minded child.

Gay Rights


What do you think about gay rights? Do you think someone should be discriminated against because they don’t act the same as you? This is a lot like when the African Americans were treated differently in the 1900’s, and it’s not fair. In fact, children raised by gay or lesbian couples fair just as well as any other child, gays don’t effect society in a negative way, and contrary to what most military leaders say, their talents and hard work add to the armed forces’ effectiveness in an entirely positive way.

According to the U.S. News & World Report there are now more than 160,000 families with two gay parents. The number of children raised by gay or lesbian parents is more than likely to be closer to one million children. And those children fare just as well as any other children.

“I just say I have two moms.” That’s what a girl named Madison says about her two moms when explaining to her friends. “They're no different from other parents except that they're two girls. It's not like comparing two parents with two trees. It's comparing two parents with two other parents.”

Also, according to Gallup Polls, 89% of people say gays should have rights, and 57% think their lifestyle is acceptable. So most of the time people think gays are okay to live with. And yet 40% think that same sex marriage should be legal. And 49% want a ban on these unions. If gays are okay people, why do we want to suppress them?

Another thing: the military discharges more than 11,000 people a year under the current “don’t ask don’t tell” policy, and in the process has lost more than 1,000 service members with important talents, including 58 Arabic linguists. And with the military stretched thin as it is with two wars going, we need those 11,000 soldiers. Three quarters of the soldiers returning from Iraq said they are "personally comfortable" with gay people being in the armed forces. So why not?

Why not? Because they are different. People often discriminate against those who have major differences. But because of that, we need to fight for their rights. People say that they [gays] have a negative effect on society and the children they raise. But what they are really doing is helping. They raise many of the world’s orphans because they are unable to have children of their own. And they provide many skills the military needs to win wars. So why not help them get their rights?

din-din is what again?

tonight we are eating "but nobody likes it."

yeah. i have 2 extrememly pick y kids and they have to deal with whatever it is i decide to cook. i am the provider and i provide. nowhere in my contract does it say i have to be a short-order cook or fix everyone something that they will like. with the 2 littlest ones, that would be pizza and chicken nuggets for every meal, day in and day out world without end amen. for the record, i fix A LOT of varied meals; the younger ones are just so vocal about their dislikes (which they find after they taste the food, is actually yummy), they never give it a chance without an argument. i have come to the conclusion that they are simply drama whores.

so we have a lot of conversations that go like this:

mom: foooooooood.

child: what is it? ew. i don't like that. i'm only going to eat bread.

mom: how old are you again?

child: five.

mom: then you'll take five bites of each thing on your plate, just like you're told to do every night. (fortunately for them i only put the number of bites they are required to take on their plate, so they usually end up cleaning their plates anyway. sooooo clever.)

child: nooooo! i don't wannnaaaaa! i don't want dessert! punish me with bread and butter! (for clarification, that is what they get if they take one bite of everything and refuse to eat anything more. i will not starve them, but i will not cater to whims either.)

mom: sit down and eat or stand in the corner and you can eat cold nasty food when the rest of us are done.

child: okaaaay. yuck. (pouting. faces from calvin and hobbs cartoons appear, accompanied by gagging sounds.) (or , pouting. then, hey!! this is really good. i don't like it, but i love it.)

i have a take on the classic green bean casserole that makes it into a one-pot meal. i add cooked ground turkey and toss in some rice. one night, i discovered i was out of ground turkey, so i tossed in some frozen pieces of chopped cooked chicken instead. i answered the question of "what is it?" with "nobody likes it so it doesn't matter what i call it." i waited for the gagging sounds to commence and they all went. "wow, mom. this is the best casserole you've ever made!"

so we are having "but nobody likes it" for dinner tonight. and the kids are actually cheering.

webster's ninth

of all the four-letter, one-syllable f-words in webster's ninth (out of date, yes) collegiate dictionary, face fact fade fail fain fair fake fall fame farm fart fash fast fate faun fawn fear feat feed feel feet fell felt fend fere fern fess fete feud fice fief fife file fill film find fine fink Finn fire firm fisc fish fist five fizz flab flag flak flam flan flap flat flaw flax flay flea flee flew flex fley flip flit floc flog flop flow flub flue flux foal foam foil fold folk fond font food fool foot forb ford fore fork form fort foul four fowl frap Frau fray free fret Frey frig frit froe frog fuck fuel full fume fund funk furl fuse fuss futz fuzz fyke, only fuck makes me feel better when i am having a bad day. see, i'm not uneducated. i'm a wordsmith; the words just come to me.

check your mirror

I have been trained to listen.

I had the distinct displeasure of having a supervisor give me a link to a Fox network show "Freedom Watch" video entitled "Man detained and harassed at airport for carrying cash." Forgive me for not knowing the names of any of the gentlemen in suits. I don't watch tv and they aren't wearing name tags. Fox network spliced up the 25-minute audio into a little over 1-minute sound byte to make it sound like just TSA personnel are "interrogating," but if you listen to the whole audio cut, as I have, you will hear that TSA (which actually means Transportation Security Administration, not safety) stops their questioning and calls in the Missouri police. Ninety percent of this takes place between a single police officer and the passenger....not with the TSO (that is, Transportation Security Officer).

I can hear the sound of metal detectors in the background, as well as the sound made by luggage on the rollers exiting the x-ray machines. This conversation took place in a private screening room, located on or adjacent to the checkpoint, specifically designed for passenger privacy.
I can hear that there is one passenger in the room.
I can hear that there are two voices belonging to Transportation Security Officers, of unknown rank.
I can hear that there is one Missouri police officer in the room, who communicates to dispatch via radio.

A man comes through the security checkpoint in St. Louis with a metal box in his carry-on. The metal box is removed from the carry-on for additional inspection and the TSO sees a large amount of money inside. For the safety of the passenger and his belongings, the TSO is required to ask if the passenger would like to continue in a private screening room. The private screening room is indeed "windowless," thus also rendering it "private," which is out of the public eye. The TSO is required to take a supervisor into the private screening room. Once in the private screening room, the passenger refuses to answer questions about the amount and origin of the cash. Although it is not illegal to carry cash on an airplane, large amounts are considered suspicious and worthy of a second look. Since the passenger refused to divulge how much cash was there, that made him look more suspicious. The passenger refused to answer questions about his business in St. Louis, or why he was traveling with the cash to Virginia. He would not answer whether the cash was his or not. That is also suspicious. Why do they want to know? Well, they bring up the DEA. That is a big fat clue. I determined that they think he was selling or smuggling drugs....which is an illegal activity.

The Missouri police officer contacted dispatch to determine if the passenger had a criminal record. While waiting on the report, a further investigation of his belongings ensued. Once they discovered checks, pamphlets, and other merchandise from the political organization "Campaign for Liberty," it was determined that he did not present a threat to the aircraft. Only AFTER the TSOs and Missouri police found all of this other stuff, did the passenger finally decide to answer some questions. Ultimately, a three-minute discussion would have stopped this whole 30-minute escapade. Dispatch reported a negative outcome on his criminal record check and the passenger was told he was free to go. The TSO then followed proper procedure in contacting his Screening Manager - the man that the Fox network dubbed the "plainclothes agent."

The passenger repeatedly refused to answer questions....stating, "Am I legally required to answer the question?" It is not my place to interpret Missouri law from here, but I can safely say that it would have been a lot easier on him to just answer about the campaign contributions...or sales, whatever he wants to call it. He had no problem announcing his activities to the nation at large, but he couldn't do it in private. Hm. That makes it more suspicious after the fact. As a matter of fact, the last words recorded by the passenger, spoken to an unknown companion as he left the private screening room, were, "That, sir, is damn good recording right there." Sounds to me like it was planned.

After playing this doctored clip for the masses, without distinguishing who was doing the bulk of the interrogating...and placing all blame squarely on the shoulders of the TSA, the Fox network show's host goes on to state that the passenger was arrested, and ultimately "a plainclothes agent" appeared and magically made all the problems go away. False. The passenger was never placed under arrest. He was never threatened with arrest. He was told that due to his uncooperative attitude, he could be detained at the police station for further questioning if necessary. Because of the passenger's continued feigned ignorance, he was also threatened with a pair of handcuffs, should he decide not to walk to the station of his own will. The passenger was free to go mere minutes after the criminal record check was completed. The host of this Fox network show then went on to say, "Put his [the passenger's] picture back up there." A rich old white guy in a suit puts up a picture of a young white guy in a suit and has the audacity to ask, "Does he look like a terrorist to you? I mean, does he look dangerous? Come on!"

There is a messy legal term for looking at someone and determining if that person is a threat: "profiling." The Transportation Security Administration has specific training regarding its anti-profiling policies. It does not appear that the Fox network has such anti-profiling policies, as demonstrated by the words and actions blatantly displayed on this show. The Fox network clearly panders to an audience that wants to think it is being persecuted by some unneeded bureaucratic agency. So, to the people of Fox network and the writers and staff of "Freedom Watch": show me the face of a terrorist. Can you recognize a terrorist? You have to be able to show this terrorist face without incriminating any race, any religion, any sex, any age, any income level....can you do it? I bet not. Because there is no "face of terrorism," TSOs every day face unknown and unknowable threats, from basically harmless, yet spiteful passengers looking for a fight to the very real and continued threats that go unsung and unseen by the public.

I am secure in my training and my beliefs. You want to see the face of a terrorist? Check your mirror. I don't trust anyone.