january 2015 work m-m-m-madness

somebody please restore my faith in the usmc..... how do you NOT know where you are stationed? you can't give a building number? or a name? or a street? you don't even know your zip code? all you got is a city?

how about a longitude & latitude? you got that? clicks? anything? smdh....

 

bitch button was stuck "on" for some reason... just spoken:

"no. I don't work here. I just like the clothes." ... and he walked away....

"yes this is brand new as of 2006."

"babies are not 4. babies are 2 or younger." (to which the child in question shouts indignantly, "I'm not a baby!")

 

4th time is a charm.... finally made it off the lane, through the checkpoint, down the hall, and seated before being called on the radio.....

 

treating myself to some starbucks.... I didn't bite that SOB even though I think he deserved it. it's not a bribe. it's positive reinforcement.

 

"so, you're telling me that the website is wrong? because the website clearly states that liquids in unopened containers up to 72 oz are allowed."

so, um ....no. that's more than a friggin gallon. no. head back to bed and start your day over.

 

you want my co-worker to "shut up and get to work," do ya?

1) a wet spill is being cleaned up in that area, so you can't use that lane ANYway.

2) she is advising passengers what to do back here so they don't hold the line up over there.

3) if passengers did more listening and less griping, this line would be moving faster.

you have stood in three lines today? that would be due to the fact that you aren't a PreCheck passenger and you stood in two PreCheck lines. I can't be held responsible for your reading abilities, sir. good day. *turned away*

this close [ ] to swearing today.

riiiiiiiiiiight.

you were cutting your husband's hair at 4 am and realized it was time to get to the airport. so, you consciously made the decision and took action to shove the scissors down your pants on the inner thigh, then put on another pair of pants...... and forgot about the scissors.

just so you know, you can keep talking, but there is nothing you can say that will alter this scenario. nothing.

 

oh. you are a precheck passenger.

oh. you have a plane to catch.

oh. I shouldn't need to check anything.

oh. you want to complain because of the alarm resolution procedures.

oh. you are going to throw your shoe at me?

bring it, bitch.

new digs for little bear

eighteen years and five months ago, I brought you home from the hospital. you were wearing a pooh hat, pooh socks, and swaddled in a pooh blanket. sweet cheeks, beautiful blue eyes.... and screamed day and night. my poor little pooh bear. when you got glasses, you were the most precocious little thing with your "probally" and "amosht" and "I don't really think so." your british accent was adorable, and we loved you anyway when you dropped it upon our return to the states. smart. smart. smart. we couldn't find teachers to teach you as fast as you picked things up. you sang your heart out when you thought no one was around and your art has been blossoming in the pages of your sketchbooks. you graduated at 16 after a truly awful senior year, giving the finger to those who thought you wouldn't make it, and making us so proud to watch you. you landed your first job and quickly made friends, as I knew you would. sweet, smart, funny, adorable little bear of mine.

 

tonight, you are spreading your wings. I am not gonna lie: I miss you already. you still have your key. you had better not knock on my front door because you live here now and always. don't be a stranger. call your mother. stop by for dinner. and remember you have a piece of my heart.

 

I love you, Little Bear. happy first moving day.